A Strange Moment

The other evening I finished cleaning the kitchen after the kids were in bed and was just spacing out for a minute and somehow started thinking about something that reminded me about Spanish and I proceeded to amuse myself by having a conversation with myself in Spanish to see what I could remember.  You see, before I came to Turkey and started learning Turkish my Spanish was pretty good.  To be honest, I question that now because for the last three years I have literally lost it all somewhere in my brain.  When we were out of Turkish for three months this past summer it slowly came back. First words, then two words together, maybe a full sentence without any Turkish words intruding the scene.  Well, since then it has been coming back more.  So as I sat there I was really impressing myself with all the things I was able to say and the more I was saying (in my head) the less Turkish mixed in with it.  Because it was going so well I kept going with it and it was amazing all the words I was remembering on the spot.  Now, here is the strange moment.  I said something in Spanish like, "I just wanted to know if you liked it."  And then I tried to say it in Turkish and I could not think of how to say the verb "want."  I'm serious.  It kind-of freaked me out because it wasn't just a second of losing it, it was at least a full minute of hard thinking.  Every time I tried to say the sentence, Spanish kept coming to me.  When it finally came to me I decided to steer clear of Spanish for awhile.  I was scared my neighbor would ring the bell right then and all I'd be able to say was some bad Spanish sentence.  It made me marvel at all that goes on in our brains when we learn language.  Someday I hope I will be able to access all three of my languages on the spot and use them well (heres my confession that I sometimes can't remember the right words in English).  Until then I think I need to stick to working on Turkish until I can make the switch without panic.  It was exciting for a moment to think I could actually say something to my Grandma and Grandpa again in Spanish.